You're bored out of your mind! You have too much time on your hands! You've arrived at
THE OLD NEWS ARCHIVE!!
5/27
Whee! New comic! YAY!
Also, I leave tomorrow for exotic, scenic... uh... dammit all... Ames, Iowa! ... shut up.
But I'll be there for Odyssey of the Mind WORLD FRIGGIN FINALS. And there should be, come thursday, friday, and saturday, pictures from Finals on THIS page. That, or they've been lying to me. Bastards. If you want to know which one I am, look for the Robinson Secondary School "The Know-it-All" team and look for the tall guy with dirty-blond hair. That's me! YAY! ... so... yeah...!
3/25
First off, sorry for the lack of updates the past three weeks. The first week was my fault, as I didn't have the comic ready. However, the last two weeks, I've had no internet. My the receiver on my satelite connection died on Sunday the 9th, so we had to order a new one. The said they shipped it on Monday the 10th. Tuesday the 18th we called Directway asking "WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?!?! WHY ISN'T IT HERE YET?! WHY?!?!?!?!" They replied "It's out of stock. When we get them back in stock, we'll overnight you one." So on Friday the 21st, it arrives and we're back online. So to make up, here's the comics for not just week, but the past two weeks as well.
On a side note, I am totally psyched about the 'Skins getting Laveranues Coles. Now if only we can get Larry Centers. Then we'll have a very potent passing game.
And the fan art section is up. Click the link to the left or in the announcements.
2/3
Whoo! Finally got time to whip up and post the beta version of the new site design. I've still got some work to do on it, such as illustrations for buttons and for the background, but I like this more than the elementary version I had before. You'll also notice I've signed up for the Keenspace Top 99. Vote once a day so others may discover the greatness that is DTL. 
Also, I'm going to be starting up new areas within DTL, such as a workbook area, which will have my random sketches and such, and an area called "The Lost DTL," which will have comics from the previous five versions of DTL. It'll be spiffin'.
Oh, and 0000 Agent will be emerging from hiatus soon. No kidding.
11/5
Well, I've finally did it. I got a PS2. And all I have to say so far is this:
1. Jak and Daxter kicks ass.
2. MGS2 is freakin' cool, but really hard.
Yeah, I've got "Jak and Daxter: The Precurser Legacy" and "Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty," and they are neat. But I'm looking to get some other games, like Final Fantasy Chronicles, Anthology, and Tactics, and DDR 5th mix (But I have to get it modded first). And, of course, Kingdom Hearts.
Oh, and also, something I noticed at RPG World friday. I saw THIS. I don't know, but doesn't that seem a bit familiar? Interesting coincidence, no?
9/10
Well, not much has changed since last update, except two things.
One, football season is back! Hail to the Redskins! Pretty good week against Arizona, and I think the Cards didn't deserve half the points they got. Oh well, the next two weeks will be interesting. We've got the favorites coming into town in Philly ON MONDAY NIGHT!!! Then we go out to meet Steve "Piss and Moan about the Score" Mariuchi and the 49ers. Personally, I see the 'Skins winning both of them, and we'll have to win against Philly to get a chance at winning the NFC East.
Secondly, I GOT MADDEN 2003, AND IT KICKS ASS!!! Unarguably the GREATEST football simulation of ALL TIME. Wow. Get it for the GameCube, it is unbelieveable. Personally, I just finished kicking around the Patriots in the Super Bowl in my third year of franchise mode. Found out you're much better if you set your defense on totally agressive. 
Anyways, 0000 Agent returns tomorrow (that's my other web comic), with a major storyline. Here's a hint how major: at least one agent will die. Read it, yo.
P.S. Haven't heard all the songs, but so far, Reanimation by Linkin Park kicks major ass. Especially the Crawling and Pushing Me Away remixes. They are sweet.
8/27
WE'RE FINALLY BACK ON-LINE! YAY! And, dont forget, there's a new update schedule, so tune in on thursday for a new comic! If you're curious as to why there haven't been any recent updates, check below.
I changed computers, and when I did so, I expected some problems, but not THIS! Basically, for those who understand this kinda stuff, I basically took the 2 and the 40 gig hard-drives out of my old e-tower running on a Celeron 333, so it was in a e-tower running on a Celeron 565 with more memory (not sure how much more, but it shows in the performance). However the performance was crippled, given how it wouldn't read my sound card (no mp3s! Noooo...), and everything was displayed in 16 colors in a 640x480 resolution, neither of which I could change. So I (by which I mean my dad) took out the 2 gig and replaced it with the original 7 gig. And it worked! So I've got a 40 gig and a 7 gig. And the scanner is finally working! But it isn't seeing the server, so I can't connect to the internet. Now we're looking for wireless internet cards. Fortunately, I can update from the server computer downstairs.
(Idiot translation): I went from a piece of crap to a shiny piece of crap.
Anyways, that's why there haven't been updates. But, to help make up for my lateness, there's a new layout debuting on the 3rd! Will the wonders never cease?
... well, that's all, so yes they will.>
7/30
In case you've developed a sudden case of amnesia, there is a certain amount of redesigning going on here. However, there will need to be images uploaded to complete the new design. And... well... when I say my scanner is the source of all evil, I'm not really stretching the truth that much. So this could mean no comic next week, as I will be in Montana (spelling?) for a cousins wedding. BUT! BUT, when I get back, my brother is going to college. Guess what that means... I GET A BETTER COMPUTER! NO MORE PIECE OF SHIT E-MACHINE RUNNING '98! Anyways, also tune in two weeks from now for a special added bonus... yes, another one. A NEW UPDATE SCHEDULE! DTL will be running tuesdays AND thursdays! Yay!
6/11
Guess who's back? Back again? Hoffgod's back! Tell a friend! Guess who's back, guess who's back, guess who's back, guess who's back, guess who's back, guess who's back, guess who's back, a-Well... I've created a monster, an' nobody wants to see Andrew no more, they want Hoffgod, I'm chopped liv... ok, I'll stop now.
Anyways, the comic is back! And with school out soon (LAST WEEK! YES!), then I can start making more comics! Know what that could mean? Simple! MORE UPDATES!!! Plus, I have two more comics that will be debuting over the summer, so sit back and enjoy my show!
6/6/02
First off, a happy D-Day to all of you. Anyways, I come bearing good news! DTL will return next week with a filler comic to get things back on track, then real comics start on the 18th. This was made possible by figuring out the evil that is my scanner's new software. So look for it to be restarting soon! See you next week!
And if you're looking for GWF, it's been moved here. It's still good stuff, so check it out!
5/18
Sorry 'bout the hiatus, folks, but it was unavoidable. See my other page for the explination. Oh, and check out my Web Comics Awareness Day 2002 entry! 
Or check the hub page! That's good to.
2/5/02
Right about now, I'll bet you're all wondering "Hey, where the heck is my DTL?" Well, theres some good reasons why the comic hasn't been updated. 
Now at this point you're all thinking "Hey, Hoffgod, enough with the whining and make with the funny!" Well, as I said, I have an excuse. Here we go.... *deep breath*
Recently a lot of things have gone wrong. First, as many of you know, the Keenspace server went on the fritz. Nobody on Keenspace, including me, could update. And just about then, my damned modem goes on the fritz. By time it's been solved, it's this weekend, when everything goes wrong. First on friday, a new antibiotic I had been put on turns out to be the only medicine I'm alergic to. Of course, I don't know this until I'm coming down with a fullblown case of hives. And if that isn't enough, on Sunday I eat some bad cookies, which I'm pretty sure gave me food poisioning, because I was ill on Sunday night, started vomiting, and ended up missing the second half of the Super Bowl (DAMMIT!!!!!). Oh well, anyways, right now I'm busy experimenting with different ways to improve the comic, i.e. make the print more legible, improve the coloring, ect. I should be back by mid March at the latest. I'm really not in the mood to rush myself. Sorry folks.
1/10/02
And here we are, DTL v5.0 is up!!! Wooh! And yes, this is a RPG ripoff comic. But it will be so much more!!! It will also have high school humor and, of course, randomness!!! Whee!!!
12/17
Another version of DTL come, another version of DTL gone. Just like the four versions before it, DTL v4.0 has bit the dust. Why? Because the idea for DTL v5.0 has jumped into my mind. However, because DTL v5.0 will be much more labor intesive (but more hilarious and enjoyable) than v4.0, there may be some changes to the posting schedule (perhaps a weekly comic). Either way, over the holiday break I plan to work on v5.0. The launch date is set preliminarily at 01/01/02. Check back then. But before then, read RPG World or Adventurers! comic so you'll have a bit of an idea of what some of the stuff in v5.0 is. It isn't necessary, but it is helpful.
Keep on damnin'... even though I am a newt.
~Andrew "El Hoffgod" Hoffman
12/3
Whoo! Yeah! You saw right! DTL is back and kickin ass! Update schedule is on the top of the page, and if you're lookin for 0000 Agent, then you'll want to click HERE. Also, aside from the "Comic of the Week," none of the links on the right work, so don't click them. And keep on damnin!
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